Selfies and Parenting



"After" Selfie

“Omg, Mom, people are going to think you actually look like that!”  My 16 y/o recently got a Facebook account (apparently passé for teens in US but not in Europe and as her circle expands…).  So, now she has a front row seat to my (apparently embarrassing) selfies.  It’s true, in general adults just don’t do it well.  Teens, on the other hand, have it down to an art.

"Before" Selfie

I asked her to give me lessons.  I asked her to give my friends lessons.  In fact, we scheduled a “Selfie and Sangria” party where she could give a selfie workshop to really uncool (even using “uncool” makes me more “uncool”) 50 year olds to raise money for a friend whose husband has cancer.  Before selfies it was Snapchat.  We aren’t done with selfies (we aren’t even done with Snapchat) but soon I will master them and golf is next on the agenda (this is her 3rd year on the golf team at school).

Asking your child to teach you builds connection while encouraging independence and communication skills. Click To TweetHanding over the role of teacher to your child doesn’t have to wait until they are a teenager.  Even a very young child can teach you how to make turkeys out of hand prints like they did in preschool.  They can page through their favorite book and tell you all about the story and why you should like it too.

When we ask kids questions, we too often ask them things we already know the answer to. What color is this?  How old are you?  Did you leave the gas tank on empty?  Let’s challenge ourselves to dig a little deeper.  Most of us are going to have some time off work over the holidays.  What a great opportunity to ask your favorite kid or teen to teach you about something new!


About Author

Lisa Allred

Work Life Program Manager

Lisa Allred comes to SAS with a long history of working with families throughout the lifespan. After receiving her undergraduate degree at Wake Forest Universtity and her Masters in Social Work from UNC-CH, her career began as a child therapist focusing on parenting, anxiety and trauma. She then moved into college counseling where she emphasized student wellness and balance.

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